Final Beta's in: 418
That's after finally doubling on sunday to 338. For those of you not keeping score at home, that's bad. Very bad. Obligatory details follow:
Ultrasound scheduled for Monday to rule out ectopic. Was given ectopic warning signs and instructions.
Basically, it's just suckful. Well, and a certain amount of relieving. The truth is that if i'm certain about nothing, I know for sure that trying to actually deliver a child with my FSH level and age is close to impossible. Certainly doing it anytime soon. If I want to keep trying, I'm sure it could happen eventuallly (i'm not that dramatic) but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about having a life with my family, including kids, while I still have a memory.
Having said that, I'm here to testify that this just plain sucks. Nobody can really understand it and the truth is that when you are going through an experience like this, you know in your soul that it's 100% unique. Just as you'll never know anyone's experience, no matter how similar the facts to your own, nobody could ever know mine. Most couldn't begin to know. Only those aforementioned (with similar facts) and those especially astoot and soul-sharing (hi K!) can even begin. But I digress..
Ok i just lost my train of thought because I saw CRACK on the kitchen counter -- C. just got home.
uh...well...I'm pregnant today, doncha know. gotta go!!
Ultrasound scheduled for Monday to rule out ectopic. Was given ectopic warning signs and instructions.
Basically, it's just suckful. Well, and a certain amount of relieving. The truth is that if i'm certain about nothing, I know for sure that trying to actually deliver a child with my FSH level and age is close to impossible. Certainly doing it anytime soon. If I want to keep trying, I'm sure it could happen eventuallly (i'm not that dramatic) but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about having a life with my family, including kids, while I still have a memory.
Having said that, I'm here to testify that this just plain sucks. Nobody can really understand it and the truth is that when you are going through an experience like this, you know in your soul that it's 100% unique. Just as you'll never know anyone's experience, no matter how similar the facts to your own, nobody could ever know mine. Most couldn't begin to know. Only those aforementioned (with similar facts) and those especially astoot and soul-sharing (hi K!) can even begin. But I digress..
Ok i just lost my train of thought because I saw CRACK on the kitchen counter -- C. just got home.
uh...well...I'm pregnant today, doncha know. gotta go!!
posted by Debbi @ 6:49 PM
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